Monday, July 24, 2006
Ythe way things are
well. i shall just let things remain the way it is now. it's essentially no point to keep harping on it and be bothered by it. let go and live. what pastor shirley said on sat is really true, we can be living on earth but it feels like hell. but i'm over it i guess. as in after crying it out, i realised that there is really nth much i can do abt it anymore. thank you mau for all yur consoling, hanyun for yur hugs, yixiu and shern for yur ears. sorry i may have sounded like a complaint freak but i guess i was just too hurt. i finally know what it feels like to be left out in the cold, having nth to fend for myself. like mau said, this time, i really need to be secure in God and trust in Him to work things out. i dunno why but i'm already feeling rather mild about this. and i really dunno if it's good or bad. i do care for them and treasure them, but since this is how they think, i can't really do anything to change that. when i do change myself, the purpose is not to please them, but it's just to grow in my area of christ-likeness. we do not aim to be pleasing to others, but rather just pleasing to God. let what has happened be just a spark for me to change as well as a lesson to let me learn that life, can actually be this cruel. learning to let go is hard, but i've already taken the first step. i dunno what the future holds. but i do know that as long as i go thru this with God, things will definitely turn out for the better. (:
1:20 PM
it flickered again.
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